OH ALSO I WENT TO A BULLFIGHT

I went to a bullfight last night! It was actually incredibly fascinating. I liked it less and less as it went on (there are six rounds and they are all more or less similar) but it was still very interesting, the beginning especially. I had no idea how much of a performance it is. I completely understand it as an art. Every movement and act is calculated and means something. Of the three biggest bullfighting rings in Spain, Sevilla is the most prestigious one to fight in (Toledo is where the bullfighters make the most money, and Madrid where they earn the most fame). I am so glad I went, though I will never need to go again. But I will say, it was absolutely mesmerizing.

Consider my feelings unmixed.

I am entirely unprepared to leave. Even if I've got another two weeks in Europe, the fact that I have less than one in Spain is fahREAKING me out. Spain has not always been good to me, but in the past few weeks I have grown so much more attached. There are things that I miss about the US and am excited to return to (cupcakes), but I can get along without those things if it means I can keep this going a little longer. But unfortunately, I will be saying my goodbyes to many, many people on Thursday whose company I have truly enjoyed. The thing is, while I am highly aware that life here is like a vacation from actual life, the majority of my experience this semester has been far from it. And just as I am finally easing into having my act together enough to truly enjoy it, it is cut short. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I am the type of person who needs time, and this experience has been no different. But for only four months, I have grown remarkably comfortable here; in many ways more so than I am at home. So, villanueva? Not ready to relocate here permanently, but it is certainly a place where I can feel as comfortable as if I were at home.

This week I will be running around like a madwoman. I plan to sleep when I'm dead, or when I'm back in my bed in Chapel Hill whichever comes first. I have gifts to buy, tests to pretend to care about, and people to see off. I've got a list of places that I just want to go to One Last Time. But I have a feeling I will be back, so it's more like One Last Time For Now. Regardless, I'm buggin'. But then again, I feel much the same when I end a year at Villanova. I smell some post-graduation depression on the horizon. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it! Right now I'm focusing on wrapping things up here and finding a place to stay in London in 4 days. Yep I left something until the last minute that's weird.